3 little words

It’s just 3 little words. I say it all the time. It’s easy to say. In fact, I’ve been saying it for years; to lots of people, for lots of reasons. But do I really mean it when I say it?

The problem with words is that saying something often does not translate into easy to do, no matter how many times you say it. In fact, sometimes the more you – I – say something the less meaning it actually begins to have and the harder it is to actually do.

But these 3 words are sooo easy to say and are the portal to peace and happiness. Why then do I have such trouble putting it into practice? Well, I didn’t know I did until God set out to show me and correct the error of my ways.

For the last 10 months (a/k/a an eternity to me; the blink of an eyelash to Him) God has been proving to me in all sorts of fun (I use the term loosely) ways that what I thought I knew – I don’t. What I thought I could do – I can’t. It’s been a long dark night, these 10 months without a job, I’ll be honest. I have tried everything I know, looked everywhere I know to look, said every begging, pleading, “I promise to be good. I’ll …fill-in-the-blank…forever/never again if …” prayer I know how to say, I have yelled at God, and I have given God the cold shoulder – and always His response is the same. Silence. Then somewhere I find a penny.

What?! That’s not a response. After you find pennies literally following you around – hundreds of them – you realize that’s exactly what it is.

I began to catch on that God was clearly saying something to me through pennies this past June while I was on vacation in Paris. I was blessed to have been taken there by my partner and we had just visited Notre Dame. While in the Cathedral, I lit a small votive and said a prayer. I had been doing this in each church I visited during that vacation, which had been many, so God had heard the same supplication many times. This time though I really gave my prayer my all using lots of “Please Lords” and “Heavenly Father” and invoking Jesus’ name a couple of times because I was sure once was not enough. The trip was almost over and then it would be back at the whole job-search thing so anxiety was really setting in and I thought Notre Dame was a perfect place for my final “career” request. As we left the Cathedral and were walking down the street we stopped at a street vendor to look at something and I looked down at the sidewalk. Beside my left foot was a coin and as I always pick up coins I bent down to see what kind of Euro I found.

But I did not find a Euro. I did not find a Franc. In the middle of a Paris sidewalk I found a United States penny.

What did this penny mean? What was God saying to me? “Don’t worry Kiddo, I’ve got it all under control.”

He has performed miracles, some tiny some grand, in front of my eyes to show me that He is the One who knows and He is the One who can. 3 little words. They are still so easy to say but they are anything but little. He is teaching me the true meaning of them every time I say them. I mean them more and more each time I say them. There is a lot left to learn about these 3 little words – a lifetime’s worth no doubt. And He’ll keep teaching and leading me one penny at a time even when this season’s lesson finally ends. And this difficult season will end.

God has promised that no wheat gets threshed forever. I live on this promise. And God keeps His promises. How do I know?

I trust God.